


Neil Cries For What Seems Like The First Time in Forever

by praising_the_foxes



Series: Neilmas2k19 [1]
Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Birthdays, M/M, Neilmas2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-11
Updated: 2019-03-11
Packaged: 2019-11-15 13:58:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18074705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/praising_the_foxes/pseuds/praising_the_foxes
Summary: Neilmas2k19: Birthday





	Neil Cries For What Seems Like The First Time in Forever

  * Neil does not think living to 20 is as satisfying as it should be
  * There he is at the bar, the rest of the Foxes getting as drunk as can be, every so often Nicky and Matt coming over to chat,
  * And Neil is happy, but not satisfied
  * He wonders what’s missing, but like most times, he gets dragged off before he think about it
  * _“Happy birthday, bitch,” says a very drunk Allison_
  * Birthdays
  * Neil doesn’t get them, he really doesn’t
  * He’s just older, that’s all
  * Later, when he’s on the roof with Andrew, he’s sullen
  * Quiet in that  _I’m thinking very hard_  way
  * Andrew tells him to  _shut the fuck up_
  * Neil finally smiles (a big, genuine one) for the first time that day. I didn’t even say anything
  * Andrew grunts, nonverbal in the way he usually is, before chucking a box onto neils lap
  * _What’s this?_
  * _Open it, junkie_
  * It’s a thin box
  * Small
  * Neil opens it, and inside are five coupons labeled  _effort_
  * Andrew finally says something then: “ _For when you want to run your junkie heart out and you need me there”_
  * Neil glances at Andrew, but he’s not looking at Neil
  * _“I get to say no if I want, and these can be applied to more than just exy if you want”_
  * Neil looks down at the coupons, and then he sees the ridiculous homemade card that came with it:
  * _“Dear Asshole,_ _Happy Birthday._ _With hate, Andrew”_
  * And Neil starts crying, and Andrew is startled, his cigarette falling from his lips
  * Andrew turns and puts his cigarette out, before he asks  _what’s wrong_
  * And Andrew hates this question but he doesn’t know what to do
  * _It’s just… living to 20 feels like a dream and everyone’s so fucking happy and they’re trying so hard and even you put effort in and I… I am nothing. I have nothing to give and this- birthdays- they confuse me so damn much but everyone has all these expectations and I can’t give them what they want and-_
  * Neil stops talking, sniffling, and the quiet that follows is suffocating
  * _Yes or no_
  * Neil looks up at Andrew, wiping away tears,
  * _Yes_
  * And Andrew does the only thing he can think of and he hugs Neil
  * And Neil is stiff, and Andrew starts to pull away thinking  _I fucked up_ , before Neil clutches at Andrews sweater and says
  * _This. This is all I need right now._



Birthdays have never been good to Neil but he thinks that maybe he’s on the right track


End file.
